


Girls Like Girls

by speck_of_dust



Category: Girls Like Girls - Hayley Kiyoko (Music Video), Keeper of the Lost Cities Series - Shannon Messenger
Genre: All hail Lesbian Jesus, Enjoy!, F/F, Gay, I will S T E A L Y O U R K N E E S, If any homophobes are reading this..., Internalized Homophobia, S O M U C H G A Y, consider yourself warned, seriously, so tw for that, very gay, very very gay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-03
Updated: 2020-12-03
Packaged: 2021-03-09 21:26:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 5,869
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27503023
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/speck_of_dust/pseuds/speck_of_dust
Summary: Biana should like boys. She should. Because that's the way it works. Girls like boys; boys like girls. But the system failed with Biana, and she wonders how it went wrong. The answer? Nothing is wrong with her. It's simply the fact that some like girls like boys do, nothing new.(Or, the story of self acceptance for Biana as she grapples with feelings for her brother's girlfriend, with the help of a song by a certain Hayley Kiyoko, whom all credit belongs to.)
Relationships: Sophie Foster/Biana Vacker
Comments: 44
Kudos: 23
Collections: All_Hail_Queen_Biana





	1. stealing kisses from your missus

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (TW for self harm, not in the story, just in this note)  
> Today is December third.  
> And as of December third, I am officially one year clean from self harm.  
> !!!  
> And this story is very specific to some of the mental health struggles I have gone through, so I'm posting it today. Biana's journey is my journey and her journey might be some of your journeys, hope you enjoy!

**Ooh-hoo boy  
Ooh-hoo boy  
Ooh-hoo boy (Boys)  
Ooh-hoo boy**

Biana should like boys. She should. Because that's the way it works, right? Girls like boys. Boys like girls. Biana is a girl. So she likes boys.

But if she does like boys, she's never met The One Boy. The one that makes her feel all the things she's read about, the spark. Passion. Fire. Explosions. Chemistry. Clammy palms and giddy butterflies and staring up at the stars at night, dreaming of the one.

No boy she's ever met has made her feel like that. Only one elf has ever made her feel like that.

And they're not a boy.

They're her brother's girlfriend.

**Stealing kisses from your missus  
Does it make you freak out?**

Sophie is over at Everglen nearly every day. Sometimes she stays for dinner, eating whatever Della prepares with a smile and a "This is delicious, Mrs. Vacker!" Sometimes she plays base quest with Keefe and Fitz and Biana, and she and Fitz always beat "Team Keefiana" because Fitzphie is the perfect team. The perfect couple. Sometimes she presses her beautiful rosebud lips against her brother's, and she tugs at his shirt while he runs his fingers through her hair. They whisper _I love you_ during the quick moments they separate for breath, and Sophie smiles with her lips touching his. She always looks happiest when she's with Fitz.

And Biana tries to be happy for them. She does. But the friendly little cheek kisses aren't cutting it. She wants to to kiss Sophie the way Fitz does.

Or at least, the fleeting thought that she would like to blinks in her mind form time to time, lasting no more than a second and leaving her wondering if she'd only imagined the strange impulse. It must have just been one of the barest hints of those weird ideas, the ones for which the origins can never be traced. Because she doesn't really want to kiss Sophie Foster. Does she?

No. She doesn't. She'll just keep pressing her lips against Sophie's warm cheek and pretending- _knowing_ \- that's enough.

**Got you fussing, got you worried  
Scared to let your guard down**

Biana has a feeling Fitz knows. Of course he knows. Unlike Sophie, Fitz isn't blind. He's also a telepath, for goodness' sake, he's almost certainly poked around inside her head to find out. Normally, he respects the rules too much to interfere no matter what, but when his very female sisters starts to steal longing glances at his very female girlfriend. It's only reasonable that he'd be curious. Biana would too, if the roles were reversed.

She's never approached him about it. The confirmation that he knows, he knows, gives Biana panic attacks just imagining it. This... secret is hidden deep inside her, never to be found by anyone else. No one is supposed to know. The thought that someone might leaves her feeling violated, unable to breathe in anything but quick, short bursts and desperate gasps as the world twists into a tightening spiral.

So she tries to pretend that Fitz doesn't know she's a tiny bit attracted to his girlfriend, but it's impossible to miss the way his jaw clenches any time Biana's gaze lingers on Sophie for just a little too long as she stares at the slope of her shoulder, the curve of her calf, the sunlight reflecting off her hair and the gold flecks in her beautiful brown eyes. Biana tries to pretend he doesn't glare at her with the fiery heat of everblaze when Biana throws a casual arm around her friends shoulder and lightly brushes her bright red lips against Sophie's cheek, leaving the barest hint of lipstick behind.

She tries to pretend Fitz doesn't need to be angry, because she doesn't like Sophie like that.

She has no need to pretend that Fitz doesn't need to be angry, because there's no risk of him losing Sophie to her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story is very close to my heart, and I hope the fanfiction helps someone the way the song helped me. Go watch the song's music video, by the way, because it is FANTASTIC. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed!  
> Much love to any LGBTQ+ struggling with identity. It will get better, I promise.


	2. second story

**Boys (Ooh-hoo boy)  
Boys (Ooh-hoo boy)**

Biana likes boys, doesn't she? She's supposed to, anyway. She's supposed to like Keefe Sencen. A boy. A handsome boy, sure, with artfully styled hair and mischievous eyes and a smirk that dazzles most of Foxfire's female population. It should dazzle Biana, too. The smirk glows with his bold confidence and flirtatious thoughts and a joke that no one else knows. Keefe Sencen glows, and Biana knows that. She should adore that glow, bask in it, wish that it illuminated her and no one else.

When Keefe flirts with Sophie, whispering something that makes her giggle and blush, Biana should want to kiss him, not strangle him. And she should want to strangle Sophie, not kiss her.

Because Sophie is a girl. And Keefe is a boy. And she should be in love with boys.

**Tell the neighbors I'm not sorry**   
**If I'm breakin' walls down**

There are said to be five stages of grief; denial, anger, bargaining, and acceptance. Biana's little crush on Sophie isn't going away, and she's moved from denial to anger. This is grief, how she feels. Biana mourns the fact that she can't just be normal, won't just get a boyfriend and a husband like every other girl, and that her girlfriend is dating her brother. Out of everyone, her brother.

It feels like a physical pain, like being stabbed over and over by a polished, silver knife, reflecting the light just like Sophie's eyes do when she smiles. The sharp blade digs into Biana's ribs, just below her heart, and she has to look down to make sure there isn't dark red blood pouring from her chest, the sticky liquid never leaving her clothes, the iron scent never leaving her nostrils.

Some days she feels like she's drowning; others, like a wildfire roars inside her chest, spreading to her brain and burning every remnant of rational thought to dust and ashes and debris. The smoky haze fills her brain instead, making it impossible to see, to hear, to experience anything except for the fire continuing to rage, searching for things to destroy. It won't be satisfied until it can consume every last thing in the world. Make it all disappear. Make it all burn.

When the fire takes over, Biana would give anything to be a Pyrokinetic. But she isn't; she's just a Vanisher. She can't burn it all, she can't release the fire from inside her and let it destroy everything it wants. So she does the next best thing. Screaming and crying and punching walls. Anything to appease the fire. To make the pain go away.

She punches the wall and doesn't care about the damage to the house. Just about the damage life has given her.

**Building your girl's second story**   
**Tearing all your floors out**

Biana would be lying if she said she doesn't sometimes dream of things she'd never do. Of telling Sophie how she feels.

It's so vivid in her mind, from the burnished colors of autumn leaves to the breeze sweeping Sophie's hair around her face to the scent of apple pies baking at Everglen. October, that would give her time to mentally prepare for this, make it just a tiny bit feasible.

She would take Sophie's gloved fingers and lace them with hers, the scratchy wool brushing against her own bare palm. Sophie always got cold easily, and even her knit sweater wouldn't be enough. Before long, she'd be shivering, despite the extra body heat from Biana standing so closely, one arm wrapped around her shoulders, bodies nearly pressed together. Like a chivalrous gentleman, she would offer Sophie her own jacket, and Sophie would take it gratefully.

Such a couple thing to do. And then Biana would make it official.

Sophie would give a shy smile, the glint of her white teeth barely showing through her slightly parted lips. Her lips. Rosebuds, cracked and dry. Instead of replying verbally, Sophie would bend down and press those lips against Biana.

She tastes like sugar.

When Biana opens her eyes, she's standing with her nose touching Sophie's, mouths centimetres apart. She's lying in her bed, covered by cool sheets and above soft pillows. A book rests on top of her chest, forgotten as she got lost in the daydream.

That's what it was. Nothing more than a daydream.

It's so real, though, in her head. It was so real.

The daydream shouldn't be a few stolen minutes; it should be a single chapter in the entire love story of Sophie and Biana, mapped across eternity. She wants to build that story with Sophie, tell it through actions instead of thoughts.

The next day, Biana takes Sophie on a date. Well, it's not really a date- but they're going to the Forbidden Cities, just the two of them, to hang out. It sounds like a date to Biana. To Sophie, it's no more than a simple friendship outing.

But it's the most Biana can get, so she'll take it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (If anyone caught that, the imagined kiss scene takes place in October because of Girl In Red. Because of course, I can't limit myself to just one sapphic song.)  
> Also, it's totally a date.


	3. saw your face

**Saw your face, heard your name**   
**Gotta get with you**

The end-of-June sun glares down at Biana, making sweat pour over every inch of her. Even the hand that's currently holding Sophie's. Friends hold hands, she knows, but there is no way she will be the one to let go. Not if her hand is sweaty. Not if Sophie's is. Nothing.

Sophie asks where she wants to go. Biana is about to open her mouth and let words spill out, saying that Sophie knows the Forbidden Cities better and should lead the way, but her answer changes after catching sight of rainbows and bright colors and sparkles. Sparkles! How could she resist? She points in that direction, and Sophie nods, running and pulling Biana along.

A girl with rainbow hair and blue makeup around her eyes waves and welcomes them to pride. When she asks if the two of them are dating, Biana nearly squawks with the protests of them both being girls.

With a smile, the girl asks, isn't that the point? Handing Biana and Sophie each a rainbow flag with a blue/pink/white triangle on the side, she adds that they're there to celebrate girls loving girls.

Music plays softly in the background.

**Girls like girls like boys do**   
**Nothing new**

Biana repeats the chorus to herself over and over and over: Girls like girls like boys do, nothing new.

It's new to her, that this is... okay. Not something to be ashamed of. Just... something normal. Nothing new.

There must be hundreds, maybe thousands of people here. Girls. Boys. People that don't seem to belong with either. So many flags, all with different colors. Boys kissing boys.

Girls kissing girls.

Girls liking girls. Like boys do. Nothing new.

**Isn't this why we came**   
**Gotta get with you**

Biana looks at Sophie. She's smiling.

Not at all disgusted by girls kissing girls and boys kissing boys.

The music continues to play. And Biana starts to dance.

She doesn't even know how long it's been since she last danced. A long time, she knows that. She used to love dancing, though. The feeling of twirling around and around without worrying, of letting yourself be lost in the music and the feeling of being finally free from whatever chains one to the normal world. Of surpassing her status as an elf and becoming simply an entity of grace and movement and happiness.

She reaches her hand out to Sophie. Sophie accepts.

As they twirl together, Biana allows herself to hope.

**Girls like girls like boys do**   
**Nothing new**

For the first time since she began to notice this little attraction towards Sophie, Biana feels... not like a freak, she notes, with tears shining on her cheeks as she holds her hand above her for Sophie to spin.

Not like a freak at all.

Just another person.

Someone who likes girls like boys do, and it's not a big deal at all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Sniff* My little girl who's actually older than me is all grown up and accepting herself!  
> The rainbow haired girl at the beginning is Savannah/The Queer Kiwi because, yet again, I must abuse the existence of as many sapphic musicians as possible.  
> Still, this verse of the song is so powerful, especially the first time someone hears it. I hope I did the self acceptance in this scene justice.


	4. steal your thunder

**Boys**   
**Ooh-hoo boy**   
**Ooh-hoo boy**

Biana doesn't like boys. At all. She knows this now.

And it's okay.

It's okay that the one that makes her feel all the things she's read about, the spark; Passion, fire, explosions and chemistry; clammy palms and giddy butterflies and staring up at the stars at night, dreaming of the one- it's okay that the only elf who has ever made her feel like that isn't a boy.

They're her brother's girlfriend.

And the one's gender doesn't bother her anymore.

**Always gotta steal your thunder**   
**Watch me like a dark cloud**

Now that Biana knows it's okay to feel the way she feels, she doesn't let go of all that shame immediately. There's still that little problem of no one in the Lost Cities- except maybe Sophie- recognizing that it's okay, and no amount of validation would actually make Sophie like her back. But she does feel a little better. That song, the one playing in the background of the pride parade... it didn't solve all of her problems, but it felt like...

Like a hug enveloping her as she breaks down after such a long time of pushing all of her problems down inside her. Like a hand rubbing her back, a comforting voice whispering that it's going to be okay. It doesn't her solve her problem. But now she doesn't have to do it all on her own. And just that means the world.

She becomes bolder after that song. More confident in who she is. She lets her lips linger on Sophie's warm cheeks for longer than what's usually considered to be inside the realm of just friendship. She lets her smoldering gaze of desire burn Sophie without making any attempts to hide what she's doing. She takes tips from Keefe on how to flirt, and tries a few lines on Sophie. She doesn't worry about Sophie finding out, because Sophie is about as observant as a rock when it comes to romance. But when Fitz's glare lands on her, she simply smiles innocently.

Biana has joined the love square. And she's become a strong, shameless competitor, ready to arrive like a storm cloud and let her feelings rain down on Sophie, overshadowing Fitz's rays of sunlight.

**On the move collecting numbers**   
**I'ma take your girl out**

Although Sophie is the only one Biana really has feelings for, that doesn't stop her from flirting with other girls. This the first time in her life she's actually let herself be attracted to her own gender, and after so long trying to repress it- this goes for far beyond Sophie, Biana had a mini crush on Stina as a six year old and many others- she's going to take this opportunity to experiment.

Somehow, she manages to discover Foxfire's queer female population, and moves through them like a hurricane. Flirting and breaking hearts and developing small, fleeting crushes, even as she never quite climbs out of the rabbit hole of feelings for Sophie. The giddiness and butterflies come and go for other girls, but when Biana feels for Sophie endures, staying steady no matter what. Biana might even go as far as to call it love.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay but like Biana going and flirting with all the girls hurts me. Why can't I be one of those girls? I would 100% love to heartbroken by Biana. Ahhhhhhhhhhh.


	5. don't tell me

**We will be everything that we'd ever need**  
**Don't tell me, tell me what I feel**

She doesn't come out and say she's attracted to girls, but she no longer makes an attempt to hide it. She never introduces anyone as her girlfriend, even when she does have a few small flings. But she holds hands with girls in public. She flirts openly with her own gender. She wears pride colors and checks out pretty girls and sings the song that played at the pride parade.

And yes, rumors are floating around. People are calling the Vacker girl a queer and a lesbo and some more offensive words. Some treat her like she's contagious.

But Biana doesn't care. Everyone trying to bring her down is already below her. They can throw sharp words at her like rocks and rotten fruit and knives, but Biana isn't made of glass anymore, when something heavy and hard can make a hairline fracture that turns to a spiderweb and then the entire thing is just small, broken pieces. No, Biana is made of iron. She doesn't care what they say about her. They can't hurt her. They can't stop her from finally living her life authentically.

Proudly.

**I'm real and I don't feel like boys**  
**I'm real and I don't feel like boys**

Biana doesn't like boys. But her feelings are still valid, no matter how many people tell her that she's just confused or mad at men or going through a phase. No matter how many times the words begin to burn into her brain, being seared in irremovable letters, suddenly a part of who she is. The doubts keep coming like a weed; even if she tries to cut them down, they grow back.

Whenever the doubts start to overwhelm her, the weeds becoming more prominent than the flowers of pride and girlfriends and pretty girls and flirting and holding hands and kissing cheeks, she listens to the song. The song that played and made her finally feel seen.

Listening to that song reminds her that she's real. Her feelings are real.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> With the possible exception of the chorus, this is my favorite verse in the song.  
> Also, Biana is a queen. P L E A S E F A K E D A T E M E , I W O U L D B E H O N O R E D


	6. heard your name

**Saw your face, heard your name**   
**Gotta get with you**

It's been months since Biana went to the Forbidden Cities with Sophie and accepted her identity. The unbearably hot months of summer are over at last, slowly turning to the autumn chill in the air.

She's had three girlfriends in that time- three. _Girlfriend_ is kind of a strong word for relationships that never lasted even a month, and were based more on crushes flitting through their minds than real feelings, but girlfriends. If the Biana from six months ago heard that she'd have not just a girlfriend, but multiple, she would have laughed with disbelief and squashed the tiny spark of hope that rose up in her.

She can't say she misses the Biana from six months ago.

But the brief, short lived feelings she's had for the other girls have faded, and she's still in love with Sophie. The feeling has barely fluctuated over that time. It's lessened slightly during her relationships with other girls, but never disappeared. At this point, she's so used to her attraction that she doesn't notice it all that much. It's just like soft music playing constantly in the background. Biana hears it during the silence, when there's nothing to distract her, but it's usually just a faint presence.

Sophie's love for Fitz has endured too.

And it breaks Biana's heart every single time she notices.

**Girls like girls like boys do**   
**Nothing new**

A week or so later, Fitz confronts Biana for the first time about her feelings for Sophie.

Not so long ago, the mere thought made Biana freak out. That was the old her, though, the her that didn't know her sexuality was perfectly normal. Nothing new. She's accepted it now. More than accepted her sexuality- she's embraced it.

So when he walks into her room without knocking, takes Biana's notebook covered in sketches of fashion designs out of her hands, and lets his teal eyes meet hers as he says they need to talk, she knows what he wants to talk about. And yet, she doesn't back down. Biana squares her shoulders, tilts her chin up, lets her legs spread out in an unladylike position as she crosses her arms.

He knows she loves Sophie. Fitz says that, and repeats it when she doesn't react. After his third time, she finally replies by asking him what he intends to do about that. Fitz doesn't have an answer, other than telling her she needs to stop.

Her cool composure is ruffled as she snaps at him to not tell her what she feels. His only response is that Sophie is his boyfriend. She belongs to him.

Biana rolls her eyes and says that Sophie doesn't belong to anyone, and she's her own person. After conceding, Fitz adds something about her feelings for his girlfriend bothering him. If Sophie doesn't return them, then it doesn't matter, is Biana's argument. And anyway, Fitz should be more worried about Keefe.

What really bothers Fitz is revealed soon after. A queer girl after his girlfriend is much more annoying than a normal boy after her.

Biana is made of iron. Not glass. So she doesn't let the words hurt her, even though it's hard, when her own brother rejects who she is. She quotes the song to him. _Nothing new._

**Isn't this why we came**   
**Gotta get with you**

Soon after that conversation, the entire Lost Cities knows. Fitz tells her parents, who probably already knew, and well, word gets around. This would probably bother Biana more if she'd made any effort to keep her sexuality a secret, but still, she'd have preferred to tell everyone on her own terms. On her other hand, now they know, and the thought of simply sitting down and saying the words that explain she's lesbian doesn't sound all that appealing.

Some people hate Biana for it. She hates them right back.

Her friends all jump to her defense when needed- even Fitz comes around eventually. Biana's so-called courage (she doesn't think it takes all that much bravery just to be herself) inspires Tam and Keefe to accept their own sexualities and start dating. Everyone in their group is happy for them- after all, the two are adorable together. Some other kids and teenagers, mostly younger than Biana, tell her how she made them more comfortable with who they are as well.

Biana tells them it was all due to the song. She sings it for them. She didn't used to sing much before, but rather likes it. Sophie says her voice is pretty.

Biana still thinks Sophie is pretty. And so much more. She's still too in love.

**Girls like girls like boys do**   
**Nothing new**

Before long, Sophie comes to Biana in tears. While Biana sets up the tissues and ice cream and movies for binging and paper for lists of all the reasons whoever hurt her is a terrible person, Sophie explains how she and Fitz broke up. She was the one who broke up with him, not the other way around, but it still hurts.

Biana would be lying if she said she didn't feel just the tiniest spark of joy at that. Immediately after, guilt washes over her. Her best friend, her crush, is heartbroken, and she's happy. What a monster. And just because Sophie is single at the moment, doesn't mean she'll suddenly like girls.

The question that spills from Biana's lips is simply a wondering why. Fitz and Sophie seemed like a happy couple, a perfect couple. Fitz would shower her with baked treats and compliments and gentlemanly gestures. Sophie would blush and giggle and twirl her hair and gush to Biana about the butterflies in her stomach. They were perfect.

But evidently not, because they broke up.

Through her tears, Sophie explains that she tried so hard, so very hard, to make it work, but no matter what she did, she couldn't feel a spark with him. She liked him, but it never turned to love, and she didn't think it ever would. Biana understands immediately- it's what she felt for all the other girls instead of what she feels for Sophie. And she broke up with the other girls, didn't she? Because they never had that same spark.

Passion. Fire. Explosions. Chemistry. Clammy palms and giddy butterflies and staring up at the stars at night, dreaming of them.

_That spark._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not cool, Cracker Boy.  
> Kam, though. Kam is cool.  
> Kam is very cool.  
> And ooh, Fitz and Sophie broke up! What's going to happen next??? You'll find out tomorrow lmao.


	7. Chapter 7

**I've been crossing all the lines, all the lines**   
**Kissed your girls and made you cry, made you cry**

Before Biana knows what she's doing, she leans in. That spark for Sophie has been burning inside her for so long. She needs to release some of it, because it's a good feeling, but it's so strong, and if she doesn't release some of it, she will explode.

She leans in and presses her lips to Sophie's as the song echoes in her head, background music for all the daydreams of this moment.

**Ooh-hoo boy**   
**Ooh-hoo**

Kissing girls is so much sweeter than kissing boys.

Sophie tastes like sugar.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Cries in "has never kissed either"*  
> *Celebrates in "has never kissed a boy"*  
> How anyone thinks I'm heterosexual at this point...  
> Anyway adslkfjdslkfjdslk they kissed!


	8. girls like girls

**Saw your face, heard your name**   
**Gotta get with you**

Their lips have barely done more than brushed when Sophie puts her hands on Biana's chests and pushes her away. Immediately, Biana stops. What was she thinking? Sophie screams the same question and Biana rambles out apologies. Of course Sophie doesn't like her. Of course. She was an idiot, temporarily overcome by madness, temporarily overcome by love.

She repeats the word sorry over and over again, never having meant anything more. Nothing she's said or done has ever truly expressed what she felt more than that sorry...

Other than that kiss.

Biana was made of iron, but when Sophie rejects her, she turns to glass. Broken glass. Even the thought that she kissed Sophie- the slightest kiss, but still a kiss- doesn't do much to console her. In tears, she continues to apologies. And break.

Sophie presses a finger to Biana's incoherently rambling lips, silencing her. Her gaze never leaves Biana's eyes, those brown and gold irises reflecting the light as they bore into Biana, as she says the words Biana never dared to hope she would hear: _I do like you back, like that._

For fear that doing so will shatter the illusion, Biana refuses to breathe.

Sophie continues with how she isn't ready yet. Not over Fitz yet. But if Biana is willing to wait...

Her voice trails off. She ducks away and leaves.

Biana is left pressing her fingers to her lips, still tingling with the memory of Sophie's.

**Girls like girls like boys do**   
**Nothing new**

Days stretch into weeks that stretch into months, and Biana begins to wonder if she imagined the part part of Sophie's confession that made her feel things she'd never, not once in her life, felt before. That feeling, that spark even brighter than the one of simply unrequited love, starts to fade over time, leaving heartbreak in its place.

Sophie hasn't spoken to her in months, beyond mundane pleasantries. Being rejected romantically by Sophie, that's a painful thing, but it's still one thing. Losing Sophie in her life completely...

Biana hates that. Despises it.

She dates some more girls while she waits for Sophie to be ready, something that might never come. Something she doubts will. Biana lets the new girls kiss her lips and her forehead and her neck, she lets them whisper sweet words, she lets them slip a hand up her shirt and finger the hooks below the fabric. She tries to let them fill the gaping hole Sophie left in her.

Nothing works.

**Isn't this why we came**   
**Tell me if you feel it too**

The months continue on, until it's almost a year. Biana would like to pretend she doesn't miss Sophie. But she'd be lying.

While Sophie pretended Biana didn't exist and Biana pretended her feelings didn't exist, the world went on. The last of the autumn leaves fell, and soon, snow began to fall too. It got colder and colder, just like Biana kept getting colder and more hopeless. Unlike the seasons, which soon began to bring back greenery, plants, flowers, warmth, Biana stayed in the same state of grief, of filling emptiness with other girlfriends and singing sad songs and never dancing. It got even warmer outside, until it's nearly summer.

Biana can't believe how quickly time has passed. It doesn't seem all that long ago that she was a scared little girl, afraid of who she is and trying to hide her feelings. Maybe time went by so quickly because everything since Sophie left her sitting in her room, touching her lips, feels forever, but one where all the days blend indistinguishably together and feel like just one eternal day rather than hundreds.

But it's June now, and it's been almost a year since she was that old version of herself. It's been almost a year since she started to embrace who she was.

Even though Sophie won't be coming with her this year, she makes plans to go to pride. Biana wants to celebrate her sexuality, the fact that she likes girls. She wants to be proud of it. Maybe to sing the song and help other girls who feel a lot like she used to. To be like that rainbow haired girl who handed her the flag and told her to celebrate.

Biana tells Fitz her plans, and goes.

There are hundreds of people there, and Biana doesn't know any of them. But meeting new people has never been all that difficult for her. She finds a group of queer girls about her age, and starts flirting with one, finally getting a chance to use that bad pick up line when she feels a tap on her shoulder.

She whirls around. It's Sophie, holding a pride flag of pink, yellow, and blue, a sad smile on her face. On her lips, a request for Biana to forgive her for taking so long, and plea that she'll finally let Sophie love her for real.

Sophie still tastes like sugar. The song plays, hitting the chorus just as their lips touch.

**Tell me, girls like girls**   
**Like boys do, nothing new**

The time after that feels like a dream, one that Biana might wake up from any second. While she was waiting for Sophie, everything seemed somewhat muted and monochrome- now she sees the world as it used to be, and wonders if it's really so bright, so vibrant.

Dating Sophie is everything she dreamed of. The spark of passion, fire, explosions, chemistry, clammy palms, giddy butterflies, staring up at the stars at night while dreaming of her- it's all there. The spark never seems to fade, and it never hurts her like the burning of unrequited love.

Not everything in Biana's life is suddenly perfect. She has to deal with school, with struggling to keep grades up. She has to deal with Fitz, furious that his sister is dating his ex. She has to deal with the occasional argument against her girlfriend. She has to deal with the hate of strangers who have never met her, who simply judge her on who she loves. She has to deal with protesters and matchmakers and councillors alike denying her the right to get married.

But it's all worth it when the council finally votes in favor, nine to three. It's all worth it as Biana kneels down to propose and Sophie accepts with tears in her eyes. It's all worth it was the wedding plans swirl by in a frenzied hurricane of dresses and cake and invitations. It's all worth it as Grady walks Sophie down the aisle, gives Biana a warning glance, and lets Oralie pronounce them wives. It's all worth it as Biana kisses her bride.

It's all worth it when Sophie and Biana step onto the grass and the music starts for their first dance as a married couple.

**Girls like girls like boys do, nothing new.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaaaaaaaand, scene!  
> Yay, it all worked out in the end! :)  
> I have a giant mushy A/N next, but if you don't want to read that, you can leave now. Thank you so much, and I hope you enjoyed!


	9. author's note

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is just an author's note, you don't need to read it.

_Girls Like Girls is a story about elves. A fictional girl living in a worldbuilt fantasy setting, who is in love with another fictional girl of a fictional species. These characters aren't even my own imaginary characters- they belong to the original author. Yes, this story is completely fictional._

_And yet, it is not that fictional at all. While the setting may not exist and the characters may just be figments of my imagination, the story itself is all too real. Because Girls Like Girls is not a story about elves at all._

_It's about insecurities and the simple, common battle of a love you have to fight for. It's about wishing your feelings away, and not just because they aren't requited. It's about hiding pieces of yourself for fear of rejection, and about the cage of pretending you're someone you aren't. It's about the dark, ugly, lonely place in your mind called internalized homophobia, and the winding, obstacle-ridden path to self acceptance. It's about a fictional girl who is not fictional at all, because so many of us have been her, so many of us still are, and a journey that far too many of us know far too well._

_It's a story that reveals far more of myself than nearly everything else my clicking of buttons at a keyboard have created, because I have been on that journey too. And my hope, as an author, is that it resonates with the readers too, the ones who have gone through this experience, who are still in the midst of the storm. And I hope- I hope- that these people, reading this story, can take its words with them past when the story ends, can let its words seep into them and linger on their mind, drawing them closer to this end goal of knowing, accepting, and loving who you are._

_I didn't write this story just so it could entertain people- yes, that is a reason, but I also wrote it to help people. People who are just like the person I used to be, frantically denying and hating my feelings for another girl. People who need this story, this song, this message, just as desperately as I once did._

_There is a reason Hayley Kiyoko's song Girls Like Girls got to be so popular. It's not just because it's good music, though it is. It's not just because it can be a queer anthem, though again, it can. It's because, for so many people, this song was the first thing that made them feel accepted. Like it's okay to be who they are, like there is nothing at all wrong with it. Because there isn't._

_The song is so popular because so many girls- girls with feelings for other girls that they felt they had to be ashamed of, hide, ignore- because these girls stared at the screen showing the video with tears in their eyes, because it was the first thing to say the words they so desperately wanted to hear. Because just the two simple words_ nothing new _echo with the power of storms and volcanic eruptions and supernovae. It is nothing new for girls to like girls. Nothing strange, nothing abnormal. It's simply another feeling. Nothing new._

_This song didn't only allow people to accept who they are. It allowed them to embrace it. And that is why I wrote this story; to share that message, that feeling, with anyone who many need it. Truly, so many of us need it. And as someone who has been there before, who wants to share the words I wish I had been told much sooner, it is my duty and my honor to share that message with you. I have to share with you the fact that what you feel is not just okay, but incredible. These are your feelings. They are real, valid, and should be loved. And so are you._

* * *

**_Girls like girls, like boys do, nothing new._ **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> <3


End file.
